Remembering

Well, tonight is a night for remembering the starlight within, and connecting new and old things.  The lights are shared with us from billions of years ago, a wink of a universal eye.

My life has always been about caring — although that may have been hard to see when I was objecting to a dearth, or a mistake in care.  That’s why I’ve had such a hard time with anger, because I experienced such a powerful failure of care in my earliest infant days, and I have been seeing the world since then with the agonized eyes of someone who loves, doesn’t understand and is overwhelmed with terror.

Now that I have made this connection (although I have not yet recapitulated the most painful memories, which I think I need to do) I can heal more rapidly.  My inside and my outside, and my right and my left can know what each other are doing again.

Things have been changing for the better in a lot of ways for the last couple of months.  I have opened up a new level in my spiritual practice.  I have started clowning, finally!  This way of clown has a system of uncovering the clown we already are.  I can’t wait for the unfolding.  And other things are happening.

i am grateful for all those who have supported me, and even those who have hindered me, as they have prompted much thinking (as well as concomitant propulsive emotional activity).  AND SOME WHO HAVE DONE BOTH.  This includes parents, of course, the Reverend (my aunt, Emily Preston), and the Aniyunwiwa, the Cherokee, who have shared a stellar path of such richness with me that I could not possibly have developed on my own.  And, of further course, my dearest friends, some of whom will read this as soon as family.

Good night!

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